thoughts

LET THE WORLD KNOW....

2009-05-07T18:04:00.000-07:00

Man is a social Animal.. But isnt he also not supposedly RATIONAL.
I simple miss the point in people deriving pleasure in letting the World know their feelings.
Something that has started irritating me oflate is the GTALK STATUS Message.
Gtalk Status msgs have been adorned with Philosophies to the Symboled Expletives..
Is it a freak sign of letting the world know that you are up to something , Is it the Dirty EXHIBITIONIST attitude in you that shows up in the status message or is it Childishness...

Now, having said that, I m just wondering .. Why do i have this blog?
Cheers
Push!

The balancing Act...

2009-04-05T20:49:00.000-07:00

Juggling between Kitchen and laptop is keeping me busy of late and hence this hiatus from the blog..
LOLZ!

Will be back soon!

The Feeling that Was....

2008-11-12T16:58:00.000-08:00

There are few things in life that stays forever with us. That pink barbie doll or the old cricket bat, the sweater untouched in your wardrobe, the memory of the first time you went out all by yourself, the smile on mom's face when you graduated... the list never ends!!

But there are few feelings that you would want to cherish but alas life snatches it away rather rudely!
Remember how you felt when India won the 20 -20 world cup... U would have wished that moment to prevail...!!
There are harsher moments life presents to its patrons, for instance ask a lady who has just had a miscarriage what it feels to be pregnant. She would have been deprieved of "feeling pregnant" even b4 she realised she was.

Ask the young lovers who have just broken up about love... They have already parted ways even before they could acknowledge the love they share...

But as always, all this bring in a dawn of realisation. Realisation abt what is important, what is transient!! Above all, it just reminds us, Man proposes God Disposes... and i believe God knows what He is up; So, incase He disapproves of our proposal.. Trust His instincts.... HE is always right!

poorna's songs

2008-07-08T14:19:00.000-07:00

HEre is the link to one of her English songs... ! Click on the user for other songs!
http://www.houndbite.com/?houndbite=3840

Brickbats welcome!

The Wait

2008-04-09T09:56:00.000-07:00

"She would be home anytime now. Had she been caught up with work she would have called me. Maybe it’s the omni-present traffic that’s making it late.
She would have called if she knows she would be late.
No clue what plans she would have for the weekend. I wanted take her to the temple. Maybe she would be catching up with her friends or would be working on weekends or would be huddled in her room married to her computer for two full days.
What would she want for the dinner? Maybe her regular chapattis and dal sabji or maybe she would want to indulge in rich pulav?
This girl drives me crazy, keeps me guessing what she is up to."

Suddenly, she glances on the photo hung in the drawing room. Its the Wedding Snap of her daughter.
A drop of tear greets the onset of realization.
All that remains are her thoughts that are here to stay!
Weird, Isn’t it! A mom would love to have her daughter married ("married away" = "Kalyanam panni Kodukardhu" in Tambram vocab) and yet would put on the pain of being away from her daughter...However said Childbirth meant lot of joyous pain, maybe Childbirth is the beginning of lots of joyous pain.

"Silence is Golden"

2008-04-07T11:48:00.000-07:00

It was waiting for a long time. Of all days, today it was let free but suddenly was pulled back and made to wait. Wait for a real long time. It was feeling Sick, tired and bored of the wait. It really wanted to come out and reach its destination. First it was the meditation hall, then a long speech, the a temple, all these factors contributed to the delay. Finally it was the car. It wanted to come out but again a strange but strong retaliation forced it back..
The wait continued...
If you were wondering what "IT" reffered to.. its THOUGHTS. How would it feel to suppress a person who is active in thoughts ( though i woundnt use the term THOUGHTFUL here) and equally active with spoken words. Wait, if you didnt understand my previous sentence, i was just wondering how tough it would be for a TALKATIVE person to bundle up thoughts and all those spoken/unspoken words.

I find the term TALKATIVE derogatory in the first place. Might be Silence saves us from all those avoidable conflicts and misunderstandings.. but that doesnt mean that all so called SILENT people are saintly.

Silence has to be followed under certain circumstaces, agreed, but people who hail silence as virtue really intrigue me. No fault of theirs, and not fault of mine too... They have their right to remain silent and I have my right to take a stand on their silence. A talkative person knows what a great deal of mental and verbal control ( rudely put, Numbness) yeilds a silent person. Maybe being Silent shields the individual from avoidable problems, tussles and misunderstanding. With the elementary ground rule, "Words once said cannot be taken back" prevailing, Silence is surely a winner of the race.. but is it really worth keeping thoughts to yourself and wondering if it would be right to talk.
Might be Timing is the key... As they say in Tamizh, EDAM PORUL AEVAL are the important aspects here too ...
Well.. this is a talkative post, agreed.. but blogs are not for adhering SILENCE obdiently, or is it ?

Everybody loves Raymond

2008-03-03T12:22:00.000-08:00

If at all there is anything that i love to watch (ofcourse other than my Anand).. it is the Barone family.
Be it Mr.Confused Ray Barone or Mrs.KnowItAll Marie or Mr.IDontCare Frank or Mr.NobodyLikesMe Robert or the cutie pie Mrs.Shout&Apologise Debra... they are all so natural and give the viewers the feeling of peeping into somebody's home.
Well... as someone been into HOMEMAKER status very recently, it fun seeing the bubble burst in a household..which attimes makes me laugh at my own actions...

On the whole.... I mite have been 10 years late to the FRIENDS and Everybody Loves Raymond cult in Dubayaland..but i m loving it...loving it bigtime..

Unintentional Seeds for Intention

2008-02-13T21:05:00.000-08:00

She was very very restless. She was the cynosure of all their eyes.. that was until recently. No she manages to get glances that quickly shift. What used to long period of "talking" seems to have reduced to few minutes or seconds of "Hi'ing" or "Bye'ing"...
She looked around her, wondering What has she done to be adamaned?
What her faults were?
Lost in thoughts, she suddenly remembered that her bangles were not matching her Silk Skirt ( Pattu Pavadai)
She runs into the Drawing room, shouting,"Ammmaaa.....I want Vera (different) color Valayal (Bangles)"... only to find her mom trying to put on a pair of black and gold bangles into the hands of the cute little new born. The whole family was looking on ...and to her it seemed her presence was never felt.

A simple incident of sowing seeds of sibling rivalry... Gosh .. scares me ! How many such Unintentional actions could have triggered grudge and hatred in others!!

Home Engineering!

2007-12-12T12:32:00.000-08:00

Problem Analysis and Definition : Leaky Tap? Enough Groceries? Trash Can Overful? et al!!

Confused.. welcome to my new avatar!!

Into Rabbit’s hole or In Wonderland!!

2007-09-14T08:23:00.000-07:00

A girl of ten,Alice, falls into a Rabbit hole and gets lost in the world made of populated by grotesque figures and anthropomorphic creatures.

“Alice fell into a Rabbit Hole” Vs “Alice in Wonderland”…phew!!!

Look at the ton of Difference these two phrases make.

A simple girl falling into a Rabbit hole could have triggered a Pathetic Story of Miss-venture but Lewis Carroll had the sense to celebrate even this crisis.

The Miss-venture was cleverly tuned into an adventure that has managed to lull thousands of kids across the globe.

Well …this is all life is!

All of us have our own pet assortments of pressures, concerns, worries, issues, qualms et al, but maybe we can make a festival out of them all!

It’s after all A SPECIAL OCCASION called “LIFE”

Forward!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-09-10T20:22:00.000-07:00

for 2 years i had consciously steered away from posting any FORWARDS related stuff in this blog. But this forwarded "THOUGHT" , "MESSAGE" or "CRAP" ( as i fondly call the forwrds spamming my inbox), has found an echo in me.

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman ......"What kind of man are you looking for?"She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking."Do you really want to know?"Reluctantly, he said, "Yes."She began to expound... As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?"The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more." I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain.She said, " I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man." I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... Believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for perfection. Financially because I don't need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong Enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone who I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy. God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself. When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face.He said, "You're asking a lot."She replied, " I'm worth a lot."

Oh! all i could say after i read this was ... " HOW TRUE". Marriage brings to families together and more importantly, two individuals who are open and ready to respect each other.!!!

I m sure my Mr.Right would be mumbling " not another Relationship post!!!"
all is far in love,war and ofcourse with words,dude!!

Cheers
Pushkala

Chennapatinam..Madras..Chennai...wat next ?

2007-08-16T17:09:00.000-07:00

T Nager has never failed to fascinate me. Be it the crowded railway station or the Hawker ( waiting to hack your purse) prone Ranganathan Street or the “99.99” rated BATA or THE oldest Eatery Saravana Bhavan or the trusted since ages GRT or the newbies Pothys,Chennai Silks or the “One Way“ talking Autokarans or the people who make it the happening place “US”, T Nager sums up the emotion and liveliness of the city. The richness of Nalli and mytic chimes of Kabali temple and the rhythmic beauties in Kalashetra and the mesmerizing voices in the numerous Kutcheries…..Wow!! Chennai .. U rock!

Chennai has always been a fertile ground for jobs and money. Be it the banks or industries like General Motors, FORD, LEATHER Factory or Software majors , Chennai has always had their presence in its soil. Singara Chennai has been blessed on this account. More blessings come in with the attitude of Chennaites.

Chennai, the Conservative Capital, has made the best use of its conservativeness. People have always been stringent of their purses but liberal on their passbooks. Maybe that’s the reason; most Chennaites have been able to spend a lot on their wards Education. No wonder we have “N” number of institutes around the city charging exuberant fees.

With money flowing in, and the CHENNAI- REST OF COUNTRY divide slowly disappearing, it wouldn’t surprise me if Chennai looses it CONSERVATIVENESS to some arbit TIER II city.

What happened to banglore 10 years back is what is happening to Chennai now. A city to known to live its life by its own standards..will we retain the CHENNAI label or is this change going to send us blogging abt the GOOD OL’ Days in Chennai!!

Apalikaaa adutha post la pakalam...ipppodaiki jagaaah vangikaraen!!! ( did i miss Chennai Tamil in my list :P )

Apeethu!

Pushkala!

Blog-ationship!

2007-06-16T03:45:00.001-07:00

Some asked me the reason i blog.

1) Is it plain Vetti Kirukals?
Why would a person showcase his vettiness to the world? Is it not a blessing to be Busy!!

2) A display of one's literary Skills!
Could be, but do people really spend so much time and effort to appreciate the language. "NO"

3) A Despo attempt to be heard!!
Take a life!!! All this is too virtual to harp on!

4) Think aloud and get new perspectives!
Well..one logical reason..But Why think aloud!!

Well... the person have me one logical conclusion.... he felt its the exhibitionistic attitude in each of the blogger that make him write!
well..I got thinking on that note.... Are we real like minded EXHIBITIONISTS who want to show the world ..they think!

On the flip side, who isnt exhibitionistic. !
The nature is exhibitionistic with its myriad hues and shades. If showing a sign means being exhibitionistic, then every odd movement, action, gesture, deed,word,moment are an exhibition of the life in us.

Nothing wrong in telling the world I EXIST...!
Even the staunchest of the Himalayan recluse comes down to the town for the kumbh mela...so is it an Exhibition of his faith....Nopez...its just the way of telling the world their way of life!

Well I m signing off as an confused soul wondering about the relationship i have with this blog!!!
Thanks to Mr.Confuser for making me wonder about this Blogationship

Cheers
Suha

Docked between Ships!

2007-05-26T18:30:00.000-07:00

That Singular ‘SMS’ demanding the presence in a friend’s birthday party meant an immediate scooting to that place.

But this would be only until another ship docks on the other side of the individual. Caught between two mighty Ships – Friendship and Relationship, the individual has the options shrinking !

That SMS which got the person started, now would a very diplomatic reply-‘Held up’.

How beautifully it conveys the message, I am busy with something more important than my best buddy.

Well, nothing wrong with this sentiment though, Priorities keep shifting all through out life.

But the precariousness of this Caught between Ships thingy is that, both a friend and a potential spouse are people whom you can dare to be absolutely yourself. And Courtship is a period when the affinity towards the potential spouse gets so strong that we subconsciously want to spend every available moment with that person.

Friends, somehow never even get a moment with the individual to express how happy the friends are for him/her.

A friend who has laughed out for the bluntest of teaser pulls a long face for not picking up a call. A friend who perfectly understands every vibe suddenly feels let down!

Maybe this is beauty of the whole marriage process.

It gives in a person who is a strong but subtlety expressed replacement for almost all relationships. Be it that of a father, mother, sibling and even best buddy!

Both these ships are strong, dependable and lot depends on how one steers and anchors the ships.

One need not be a captain of these ships to ensure things are fine, one can also sit back and enjoy the beauty of ocean (while the chosen captain steers the ship) but ensure you trust the captain and ship completely. One cannot enjoy seeing the serenity in nature’s lap when the Stench of a bad choice hangs over.

End of the day, I really got to know why the Vivek dialogue from Minnalae got so popular

“Figure’aa paatha odanae Friend’aa cut panivititiyae da”

How so true!!

Cheers
Suha

Perception of Perceptions!!

2007-05-22T06:04:00.000-07:00

Man is a rational animal, this rationality is condensed into a single word called perception. He Thinks and hence Perceives.

‘Perception’ itself can be perceived in many views. The whole world can perceive the same view or can differ thereby providing a spectrum of opinions.
The Universally Singular perception about day and night makes the world sleep while the stars are up and work while the sun is in his glory. The plurality of perceptions makes a life out of "livingdom".
Now how much of plurality in perceptions is digestible?
It all starts with swallowing the truth that CHANGE IS THE ONLY THING THAT NEVER CHANGES.

Perceptions exhibit the elementary characters of MATTER. PERCEPTIONS (Opinions), once created, Can change from one form to another but can never be destroyed.

The difference between Perception is just the difference between Knowledge and Ignorance. Once something is known or learnt or in otherwords something is PERCIEVED it cannot be unlearnt. The Perception on the topic/thing/person/emotion can change but the can not be destroyed or reverted back to the state called IGNORANCE. May be this is why Ignorance is called Bliss!

The change in perception can be as gradual as Evaporation-Condesation-Percipitation-Evaporation Cycle or as quick as a sublimation process or as gradual as the formation of Stalagmites , the end result is that, the change keeps happening either for the better of the PERCEPTION or for the betterment of the individual who perceives it.

Well, if the blog seems too be in nano-physicist or material scientist’ic terms to you ( I speak my heart out in my blogs!!) , here is a dash of Spirituality. The very own Sanatana Dharma, ‘Hinduism’ advocates the concept of MAYA. MAYA..a beautiful word that reminds the Mortals, Do perceive think but also be reminded that What you see is not what it is.

MAYA generates something for everyone and that something from nothing at all.

Finally, now I perceive, you have perceived enough of my fundae on perception!
So Let the MaYa of your Perception of my Perception of Perception Prevail....!!

Cheers
Push!

A Toast for Commitment!

2007-04-30T08:34:00.000-07:00

Phew… a post on relationship here again!

A blissful singledom metamorphoses into eventful commitment. If this sound just a mix of English alphabets and phonetics…..Wait… you have to know more about this.

This is lot about clarity, instinctive judgments, confidence, diplomacy, sense of timing et al.

A big decision, high stakes, life meanders around a word that is gona come out. A kiddo until a week before whose major decisions included the accessories that would best match the dress, the movie worth watching over the weekend, the shop that had the best bangles in the city, now would have to decide on the GO-- NO GO with respect to the potential suitor,

Clarity in thoughts is one big asset , it makes life so simple and easy. Needless confusions could be avoided if a person is clear about his stand on the issues that might bother the topic.

Nothing works wonderfully as instinctive sense. Trust what your heart feels and believe what your mind says. If the choice is gone be right both these would resonate the music together making it MUSIC for life.

Confidence, not just on oneself but on the whole institution of marriage is what is needed here. There is no point in walking down the aisle with doubts about the success of the relationship or about the person. Believe me, if you don’t get a sense of confidence on the person, there is always gona be a little nag in your mind making things worst for you.

Confidence at this point of time is more Instinctive than factual. But Instinctive Confidence would lead you to the Factual confidence. If you are satisfied with the person in the acquaintance mode, it would propel you to learn more about the person (Factual).

Diplomacy..huh one big tool of all the Spin Doctors. The art of Diplomacy blooms when the elections come in..Varied hues of statements and counter statements very subtlety putting across the message that There are no permanent friends nor enemies in Politics.

Talk of relationship in the same breathe, a lot depends on how we convey one’s feelings.

Not every feeling carries the same weightage and this weightage is again highly subjective. The best way is to apply diplomacy, Stress on what is need to be stressed and plainly mention what needs to be mentioned. The cliché is what just need to given a mention need not be given a explanation. Undue importance might take you on rough seas.

Sense of timing!! How aboutt waking Einstein in the middle of the night and talking Greek mythology to him or stopping him between his interlude with his first wife ( VIOLIN) and explaining an equation! Worst isn’t it!

Timing helps a ton in making sure the same sentiment reflects across!

All said and done, Close your eyes and mutter a silent prayer… For

MAN PROPOSES and GOD DISPOSES.

Cheeers!
Pushkala!

Dare To Risk?

2007-04-19T07:56:00.000-07:00

Risks...
We would have never come out of caves had nt that Early Ancestor of ours not taken the risk of venturing out. how many of us are willing to take a risk?
Well ..welll ... welll...!forget hitting moon or living in Antartica... there are many incidents wherin we prefer to remain one amongst the crowd ...STAY SAFE attitude is in abundance.
The reasons we give range from "WORDS" like PRACTICALITY, FEASIBLITY, SUSTAINABILITY, ABILITY et al..
But do we understand that all these words ( including the remote kin and kith of these words that mite feature in the context) are all subjective to a SINGLE FACTOR and that is YOU.

PRACTICALITY is a very weird word... what might have been written off as not possible by a person could actually be possible with your attitude.. and to decide whether something is gona work out or not, one should actually take a chance ..DARE to RISK atleast DARE TO THINK rather than writing it off in the first instance.

Having taken the risk to read thru blog....i agree there people with true bold DHIL!

Risking Brickbats
push!

Thinking about thoughts!

2007-04-13T07:11:00.000-07:00

The POST is abt now PARTICULAR Topic... its true blue arbit ramblings!!

Be it the mosquito Coil on face effect or Wordsworth'ish Daffodils effect ..Thinking abt past and abt things that are beyond repair has always been a habit with homosapiens -Phylum vertebrata.
Well.. its so happened that i belong to the same phylum and hence exhibit the traits of the same.... the post below Elucidates the same.!

Thoughts that Ate the Travel Time Today! ( Mosquito COIL Swirls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
*************************************************************************************
How should one react when someone acts too smart and tries to hurt to you.
Though i belive its the other person's wish to try to be rude to one... to be hurt or not is entirely the individual's disposition. To Ignore, smile away rude comments always always don't help or do they?
*************************************************************************************
Life is all about GETTING USED TO...! True....but can you get used to everything life offers you... Isnt life not about figuring out the options and chances oneself?
*************************************************************************************
Relationships arise out of chemistry between the pairs but it changes the physics that they have with others. Have had lot of chances to observe the attitude of people before and after they commited into Relationship. Well... its understandable that the folks are in the hyper enthu phase to know each other well ,get the relationship going strong and hence land up showering all their attention and time on each other. A very collegish attitude of SHE IS MY GAL sets in!
Why even the seemingly mature ones showcase this. Well,,a small observation...Public display is perhaps also a mature manifestation of SHE IS MY GAL or HE IS MINE attitude!
Whatever it .. IT IS SICK!
*************************************************************************************
Last but not the least of my pointless ponder...How do i wish the folks tomorrow..

HAPPY TAMIL NEW YEAR Day
TAMIZH Putaandu nal vazthukal
Happy TAMIZH New Year day
illa verum GUdmorningaa .. illa Summa irundaalae Vidunjudumaa?
***********************************************************************************

GOD BLESS MY READERS!!

Cheers
Push!

Old.Bold..Cold Attitude!

2007-04-07T19:55:00.000-07:00

Talk of getogethers, there happens a jambooree of Relatives. Very Innocent Kiddos to ripe 80 year old maaamis. Having been a such a fun recently, lot of things ran across my mind forcing me to pen them here!

The attitude of the youngsters towards elders struck me hard. I m no Miss.PATIENT, MISS.TOLERANT types but I always insist on a quality called ENDURANCE. Elders predominantly fall into three categories: they are either too conservative to accept our views or too rigid with theirs or they are open to our ideas.. but one can never take them for granted , you would never know how they would react!
I m not being judgemental about the beloved PAATI THAATAs at our home! They are truely a treasure! But is our attitude conveying the message that we Value them.
For once, Not everything could be understood implicitly, there are few things that have to be told and Elders need things to be told to them.
They could be annoying or at times even irritating but believe me more patient our approach is, more learnings will happen from their end.
I m going to visit a OLD AGE home today. I m doing this against my policy of NEVER TO ENCOURAGE OLD AGE HOMES... but today i feeel, they need a patient ear and may be one or two considerate words!! Even now I start half heartedly....I just hope i have a peaceful sleep tonight!

(This is the only Post in this blog where i have literally lamented my first PERSONAL Thoughts! Oooops... i need an Outlet ( N' Blog serves the purpose) and so do the countless old ppl in the home ( N' hope i serve the purpose today!) ... I just realised it and i m heading there!! )

cheers
Push!

Chemistry of relationships!!

2007-03-30T23:40:00.000-07:00

Statuatory Warning: Here comes another post on relationships….!

Few fall in love in the FIRST SIGHT ( phew.. a biological Reaction(#1) fastened by CATALYST called LOOKS/APPEARANCE)
Few fall in love gradually ( A reaction (#2) that happens at OPTIMUM CONDITIONS)
Few start of as FRIENDSHIP and turn it to a RELATIONSHIP( A reaction (# 3) that got misled!!)
Or an arranged agreement to fall I love (a planned reaction (#4) with tons of catalysts, with proper conditions set!!)

Well, I don’t have a big opinion on the chemical Reaction #1.
Relationships be it friendship or marital ones has to be borne over a period of time. Faith and trust cannot be built over night is what I strongly believe.
Reaction #2, is relatively better. But there is one thing that might upset the reaction. Courtship is a tricky period wherein it’s the GOODNESS that comes out in full form.
The element of vice be it as trivial as quick temper or social drinking is subconsciously either not revealed by the person or subconsciously not registered by the other person.
Courtship again has to mature over sometime.. But unfortunately the trend is that people either get bored of each other soon or they PERSON of INTEREST changes with the clock ticks!
Reaction #3, Mixing Friendship and relationship….this is one tricky subject to analyze. Given the fact the FRIENDS would know each other inside out …I have somehow not patronized the idea of mixing relationships.
Every relationship should be clearly demarcated.
Friendship across sexes means the physical attraction factor has been nullified. This is presume is the reason why FRIENDSHIP is given special status.
Now, turning such a pure sentiment into a RELATIONSHIP means contaminating it with the CARNAL Factor.

The worst part of the this reaction is that… even if there is just friendship and clean friendship, people around tend to hallucinate a lot and hence conjure a reaction when there is actually nothing brewing.
It takes in lot of maturity to handle a crisis like this, wherein FRIENDSHIP is at stake for the people around!

More so, One who has a picture perfect vision on the kind of person he or she wants could be pretty sure hit in REACTION #3. But unfortunately most of us do not strike with a consistent opinion. As the rule says, Change is the only thing that never changes.

That leaves you with Reaction #4, you really need not have a “MY IDEAL PICTURE” vision. Rather a vague , gazy , CIRCA 1700 picture would serve the purpose !
The whole beauty of arranged marriage lies in the fact that you start with the belief that its going to work out. And this belief metamorphosis into TRUST and faith..

Been a long post….

I believe.. I m gona come back soon with another post…on relationships obviously!!!!

Cheers
Suha!

Prior 2 Priorities

2007-03-18T05:51:00.000-07:00

Be it matrimony, be it just shopping, be it starting early from work, there is one word that drives world.. a simple ten lettered word " Priorities".
I wonder what amount of thinking goes behind defining the Priorities.
Defining priorities by itself is a priority.
Now, wat makes me talk abt priorities....Its just this, a friend happened compose a 60 questions sheet which he feels covers all the topics which are important to him., lest he misses something while conversing with a potential suitor.
I was thoroughly amused and angry when i saw that questionnaire.
It makes no sense in making a person sit through with a paper and fill in the details as if its just another exam.
Having said this, not all ppl are vocal and confidant enough to voice their thoughts, so this questionnaire might just be an ice breaker.
One thing of all impressed me mightly, the person who composed this has pumped in ample energy, good will, intention and time to understand his priorities and order them.

Though, i dont approve of the Questionnaire exchange method, I am happy ppl have started understanding their WANTS. For matrimony is one topic wherein you must be clear about the difference between your expectations and wants!

Now if you had expected a neat decent post... i m sorry... and yeah! if you want to comment-- I would just luv to know your view...

cheers

Push!

Of Life, deadlines and “dead” ”lions??”

2007-03-02T22:20:00.001-08:00

Got thinking when I read a post by a fellow blogger on the suicide of a small gal. What is life after all, if its gonna be so easy to give up!!

When even habits rather Obsessions which we pick up after a good 10years after the first wink are hard to give up, I wonder how people easily give up their right to exist.!

Who on earth does not have disappointments with life!

Some have it small, Some have it big…

But things called Deadlines and money drive the life!

Be it the tenure in mom’s womb or the warmth of parents’ lap… everything comes with a deadline. By the age of 3 years, the warmth of the lap has to be forsaken to the comfort of bed, then comes the ever imposing educational deadlines..!!!

When every thing in life is so damn time defined…. I wonder if I should call the ppl who commit suicide dead chickens or dead lions who bravely evaded the DEADLINES!!

Confused huh! That’s what I m now!! Thanks to the FEVER!

Cheers
Push!

Fever Fiesta

2007-02-20T09:04:00.000-08:00

When you are down with soaring temperature, an absolutely sick head and a tongue that finds everything bitter....all you do is swallow the pills and sleep!
but suddenly u wake n smell the aroma of hot molaga bhajji ....! wat do u do!!
mom refuses to make one...neither can u escape to the corner shop for bhajji!!
All that you can do is wait patiently for the guest to leave and then head to the marina for smacking bhajji feast!!

cheers
pushkala

Of Likes, Expectations and Ofcourse Life!!

2007-01-13T01:10:00.000-08:00

A month long hiatus from Blogging was broken by an inspiring conversation i has with one my buddies!
She having Just got into an ARRANGED Commitment had loads to share! We just got talking how Arranged and Acceptable the whole process of Arranged marriage is.
We hit upon the PIE formula...
Physical, Intellectual and Emotional Equation, with the order of importance being EIP.

The beauty of Indian Arranged Marriage System is the neatness with which it executes the Singledom. Be it the guy or the gal, they gracefully lose the goodness of Singledom and venture into the world of their own.

Least Important ones first..

Physical Equation: You might call it unworthy and cheap to look into one's external appearance.
But there is more it, is what i heard. The Face is the index of mind. Period.
I was reminded of a Reader's Digest Article that elucidated the some 17 steps for finding a relationship that lasts longer.
If i m not wrong, they did cite Appearance factor. Its more to do with how you can mentally attach yourself to someone who you are comfortable with.
Intellectual: Well, there is nothing as effective as conversation. Be it a conversation through the language of words or the language of Silence.
A conversation (not an Argument!!!!!!!!!!!) That keeps the people involved is a sign of companionship. Be it the reciprocation of ideas (views) or the openness’ in accepting things or the assertiveness in stressing things or the topic itself; the comfort level each other possess is of prime importance
Emotional: To Emote is one of the signs of Life is any form of Living being.
The Emotional Equation is The deciding factor for any relationship. Hidden behind those Spoken and Unspoken words is an Emotion that is the TRUE SELF of the person. It is this Emotional Quotient that tries to come out through the Gestures, Words, Silences, Smilies, Gifts and what not.
More than often, we are carried away by these mediums of expression that we forget to compliment the emotion. Acknowledging each other's emotion is a sure sign of the longitivity of the relationship..

Well; for all these aspects to hit the bulls eye, there are three other factors that must be kept in mind ,
EXPECTATIONS : Of all the 1001 likes a person mite have in his life, there could a few of them that he would Expect from his Companion.. ! So, its all the more important to know thyself before one might venture looking for COMPANION.

DESTINY: Being a Hindu by faith, I seriously couldn’t wrap this post without the mention of the DIVINITY. For all that’s said here, HE holds the WAND that would lead one on the right path.

OOOPSS... been a long post... be it this post or the process of Likes, Expectations and Of course LIFE is worth every moment that’s spent.

Cheers!
Suha

Being indefinitely definitely Differently indifferent!

2006-09-24T07:15:00.000-07:00

When caught in position when reality is so damn cruel that neither can u tell the world that u a re truly not comfortable nor does your “You” permit you to show the dejection; the only other way that charms the situation out is being truly differently indifferent!

When words don’t suit the situation, indifference makes its presence. I wonder if it ever solves the problem.

Its totally a different thing if someone decides not to solve a problem. Indifference is a subtle reflection of a person who wants temporary relief from the problem or rather just wants to escape from the situation for that moment.

Having said this, indifference is sometimes a worthy weapon. A weapon which is effective because no words are poured out and more than often its up to the other person to guess there is something wrong with the person who is being indifferent. This would induce a bit introspection, it’s a rather a crude cold way of saying “I m pissed off”.

But what if pople never get the “I m Indifferent Signal”.. Nothing …! Well yeah that’s exactly what happens most of time. You get nothing out of the situation!

If its not you best mush or your gang with whom you are being “ differently Indiffernt” then for sure the difference is not gonna be recognized. You would end up being gloomy and that’s it!

Now I am confused, when should I let my words take charge and when should I make the Indifference my Arsenal?

Ahem.. If u folks are wondering why on earth I cam up with this different post on indifference, well…. I just had to face one such situation recently wherein for once I lost my cool and had to feature indifference written across my face..!

Compromises!

2006-09-16T07:56:00.001-07:00

Life is always abt best compromises!
I started wondering.. how is it two people with total different nature knot into a relationship and get going for a long time.. (long time to be read “life time”!)

Again Relationships includes friendship, the inner circle of relatives with whom one tends to live his life out!
Misunderstandings do happen, fights do break out…. But everything vanishes out like thin smoke. Smoke because, its existence is not wipe out but its just dissolved (present in particulate form!) in bigger picture called LIFE.
The small differences are converted into Compromises; the small fights are considered silly trivial tussles.
How is it we choose the right people for making life wonderful. Often compromises outgrow the basic interests we have.. When this is the case the choice of person becomes the ultimate question.
The problem with the process of choosing the right person is that, one will know the effectiveness of the choice long after he chooses and spend a considerable time of his LIFETIME with that person. By then, it is often too late and it becomes the time for the BEST Compromises to cast its entry into the Stage.
Or rather, it is this way, the considerable time spent with his choice changes his attitude and “best compromises” could be replaced by “changes for the better”…!
Whatever it is … as long as her is enjoying his life (after we all have only one life time to live!), Compromise or change shouldn’t be a big issue!

If you are wondering what kindled such a post in my blog after a long time… well then…the scores of Shashhibdhapoorthi (60th bday of couples) and 25th wedding anniversary party invites are the reason!
Well…of course it their time to celebrate and let the world know they have made the best compromises !! Don’t they?

The Factor!

2006-08-12T09:53:00.001-07:00

He has always topped the Medical tests, the surgical procedures were 80% sure shot success, but this was proving to be tough! He was trying hard to stop the bleeding but alas nothing could be done. He finally gave up… only one though raced up his thoughts….”Why did they bring him late! “

She was waiting outside the operation theatre. This has turned out to be the reality that has outplayed her harshest of nightmares. With teary eyes, she waited.. a wait that seem to be dragging. Only one thought was going on in her mind….. Why on earth did he drive so hastily?

She was playfully eyeing the new water bottle the churby guy sitting next her had brought. She wanted a similar turtle shaped water bottle which also doubles up as a snack box. She made a mental note of the box. After all, she has to remind her mom to get her a similar one for the next term. The teacher cleared her voiced and asked the students to submit their Homework notebooks. She was dumb struck. She hadn’t completed the Homework! Only one thought raced her thoughts,

‘Why did I not complete the work?

He was looking at the monitor. His eyes had not blinked once in the past three minutes. They were dry…so was his face. He is trying hard to eat from a CODE plate of his colleague. His colleague hasn’t turned up and now he doesn’t have a option but to try to understand the Code in bits and pieces. After all, their project is all set for a mighty client run …when this unprecedented bug announced this bug..

Only one thing was hitting him hard….

“Why is it all bad things happen together..? what will I say to big heads waiting to prowl…heading a contingency team is tuff ask… what will I tell them?!”

Well, the GCF (Greatest Common Factor) of the replies of all the characters mentioned above is “Time”.

Be it the doctor who frowns upon the lost life just because of the “time” delay in getting the patient to the medical procedure, or the wife who is now wondering at the hasty driving of her husband who was apparently running short of “Time” , or the bubbly kid who couldn’t do her homework just because she did not have “time” or the Busy professional who is all tied up with work forgetting even to blink just because he hardly has “time” to Blink.

How what is time?

A bit of googling takes me to lot of stuff Einstein and Newton wrote, said or claimed and among such things, there is a phrase that captures my attention.. “certain system of relations”!

Time is nothing but meager system of relations. Now if you ask me relation of what? All I can say is a system of intentions and convictions rather than absurd words like animate and inanimate entities.

It’s all a matter of intention, but yeah … its not just your intention (good) that would get the right thing happen in the right “time” but rather it’s the product of the right intention of all the people directly or indirectly or even remotely associated with you.

Am I killing your time… sorry let me get my intentions right… here ends the post!

Castle Errrr... Cafetaria! I built!

2006-07-16T04:23:00.000-07:00

Castle Errrr... Cafetaria of Gibberish!

Ornithologists fascinated me. They could very patiently watch the winged dwellers of this blue green planet. It could involve hours and hours of patient wait; a wait that demands eyes behind binos staring at the sky, turning towards every hustle in the tree; keeping ears all tuned up to the birds’ songs.
Envision a similar bird watching ORDEAL, err.. though birds of totally different kind. They belong the phylum Vertebrata, class homo sapiens (humble reminiscent of the ninth standard biology classes! Sorry if found incorrect! ).
Well cafeterias dotting the city are the ideal paradise to observe these birds.
Attempted below is a humble Guide to this unique bird watching.

CAUTION: this post is the result of a very bad outing I had with my friends recently. There was nothing much I could do other than look around and observe people!

For people who did not get the hidden message in the above line.. here comes the more blunt message:
I ain’t of the habit of prying the privacy of people around, just that I went of a casual glimpsing of the people around and it so happened that I has to many birds around in the cafeteria!

1) Choice of day/time: Avoid National holidays and other festive occasions. The best day to watch these birds at their best would be on Saturdays( avoid second Saturdays though!), Friday evenings, Wednesday afternoon, sometimes even Monday mornings!!
2) Tools needed: It doesn’t need binos all that you need to do is just keep your eyes wide open; what you will get is a lesson fit enough to write a thesis on!

Foreword:

Choose the corner table which provides unhindered view of the people in the cafeteria , outside cafeteria.
Make sure you don’t dress up too well to turn heads towards you.. Well if heads still turn …don’t worry… Divinity wants it that way.!
The main skill you ned to develop in this bird watching is the Technique of guessing the mood with the body language.
People : here goes my next word of caution .. all the observations are made with respect to Chennai- a considerably not so Stylish and hype city. !
First make a casual note on all the available birds around you. For starters, its better to fix up a chosen bird and observe the traits!

The Plot:
There were a number of pairs there. Most of them were there with their gang of friends! The usual teasing each other was happening. Nothing worthy of following!
Soon, the prized catch arrived.
A very cheerful guy complete with a mobile in his hands and a coolers. A gal followed him and it seemed as though she was making every effort to look pained and sullen! They only table that was available was the one beside mine. They gleefully occupied it!! Well its up to the reader to conclude who was more gleeful.

I built my expectation list, thanks to Manirathnam, Balachander and their directorial fraternity, my mind was scanning all the cafeteria scenes right from the black and while movies to the Eastman Color ones , to the very very memorable Mouna Ragam(a Tamil movie) to the recent Madhavan movie!
(Man!!! how I wish my memory had been so helpful in my Exams!!!).

Thanks to the very dumb service in that cafeteria, I has al l the time under the son to observe them!

Hardly a word was spoken, they just sat there looking at the menu card…. OMG.. I atleast expected a “Drowned in Each others Eyes” kinda stuff!
It turned out to be a melodrama , no dialogue no giggles. For full 30 minutes, she was busy looking at the menu , searching her hand bag. He was carried away with his mobile phone.
The only audible words that my ever so sharp ears could get were “what shall we order!” .They sat there without speaking a word for half an hour and then left. He took his bike and she left in her scooty.
Now began the mighty part, the Castle of Assumptions!

Wondering as to why on earth, will they come to a restaurant and spend money for keeping mum.!
Thinking ( A process I undertake very rarely – a “Pushkala –Grey Cell Initiative”! )

After Word:
Now, why will I go to a restaurant with my friends and start prying over next table! To make things stink more, why at all would I write about this senseless stuff in my blog!!
Well.. I can sense ur assumptions,,, wait I ain’t cranky .. Just that my idle mind was waiting for something to chew on!

Castle crashed!
Gibberish Silenced!

Cheeers
Suha

Tussle amongst thoughts!!

2006-07-01T09:31:00.000-07:00

She was feeling damn heavy. She has never been through such turmoil.
Kudos to her decisiveness; she has never trod on the road to remorse. But today, she felt the she would be sooner than later running towards remorse; a hasty run to set things right.

The same girl who was jumping around until an hour and half before was immersed in scores and scores of conflicting thoughts.
Nay she wasn’t alone!
She was surrounded by two off her close friends and she was very effectively listening to their animated conversation. But lo! Every word uttered at the coffee table seemed to take her to totally different world. It seemed to bring back the memories that she has very carefully chosen to forget albeit unsuccessfully. She feigned the pain with a smile, a big broad smile (Heaven had blessed her with a natural Camouflage).

The pain began to show on her face and her friends did notice the uneasiness to such a extent that it became the topic of discussion. She tried to give them a damn. The antagonistic voice in her grew louder and louder.

A tough fight waged within her.
A war against her personal conviction and a very inviting prospect waiting for her consent.

What will I tell his eager face. Am I gonna be tongue-tied?

She gave up. She didn’t want to trouble her grey cells much! After all, she is an ordinary mortal.

She yielded to the passion….. Reached out to the menu card , looked for the waiter… his expectant eyes were not less curious than those of a father awaiting the birth of his child outside the maternity room.
With a gulp in my throat, She said..”Get me a CHESSE PIZZA!!!

Who would like to think of thinning down when you are freaking out with your friends in a Pizza Corner?
muhahhahhahhhahha!

Friendship forwarded!

2006-06-12T03:48:00.000-07:00

Monday morning often finds us staring at the loads and loads of mails….. Mail subject lines range from "rejoice its Friday"… "Happy weekend" to "Monday morning again!!!".
Well no regrets, a few of those mails are really worth looking into. It so happened that this weekend I ran into one of my friends with whom I had almost lost touch but for those forwarded mails he keeps sending me.
He seemed to zero on the point that he has never lost touch with his folks, he keeps sending mails (read forwards!). As I reminded him of staying in touch, he very coolly replied, " I m in touch with you, yaar, I send u mails every day!"
Staying in touch for that gentleman means Sardar jokes, puns on Bush, Astrological predictions, pics from Nat Geo, facts about India and not to forget those John Abraham, Aishwarya Rai pics!
Isn't that funny?
Where are those personal mails?
This set my grey cells (amazingly low in number!!) think (an honest attempt, though!).
Even a one liner personal mail would be more effective than a flash-thought provoking words-never seen before pics combined forward.
The forwards can help pick up a long lost thread with a person, but shouldn't it be complimented with a personal mail? I have been in a couple of situations wherein I have got a dozen to two mails from a couple of my folks who I can hardly relate to. I can see them sending me all crazy forwards, but I am not able to pick up a thread of familiarity with them!

Fine, let's move to the compromise mood. If a forwarded mail is their way of sustaining a relationship, agreed! But that at least it could be peppered with a personal flavor.
I wonder what the maximum size of a mail distribution list is. People BCC the intended recipients! I am not doing any Ego Resurrection by searching for my name in the mail header! Rather it's too obvious with an almost blank TO and CC holders! So this gesture of friendship is multicasted to dozens of his friends. The good thing being the sender was reminded to add me to that list.

I can draw two contradictory lines from this observation… people mend technology to suit their needs, after all, every time we get a forward, it is indeed an indicator of the clean intend to stay connected. On the flip side….. is it helping the relationship in any weird manner? When the danger of misunderstanding and broken rather forgotten relationships lurking around, is this forwarded friendship attitude admissible!

My inbox says it full!!! Hmmm!! J ! well what do think I m thinking??!

Well nothing big, looking out for impressive forwards to send them across to u guys! J

Cheers
Pushkala Pattabhiraman

As U Like It (This)

2006-06-06T07:18:00.000-07:00

This blog is the result of list of conversations I have been having with people who I know on “ I know who he is” basis.

Given my talkative nature ( a true blue Geminian that I m ), I garnish my gibberish on almost every other prey I hit. This time for a difference, I decided to understand the prey better. Well… (lemme not give you the National Geographic channel effect….)

I just thought I will let people steer the conversation and let me run with their flow.

There was one strain that was common across my preys ( err ..! Sorry for that effect again). I LIKE .. I HATE .. U LIKE ..!

What I found interesting in these conversations is people are more than eager to let the world know what they want. By doing this, they successfully save time, remove any scope of misconceptions. (Be it as simple as watching HP together and later realizing how tough it had been for your friend!!)

But on the other hand, I find this message too “Listen boss, this is what I like; if its going to be something else…! Well a big Sorry!”

Though the message is loud and clear, I bit of Compulsive ego also hangs loose on such statement. I using the word “Compulsive Ego” because it’s being brought into the picture purposely (serves cosmetic purpose though!).

The next few minutes of conversations goes about “ I LIKE WAT YOU HATE, U LIKE WAT I HATE” kinda stuff!

Well……. All said and done..Oops.. All heard and written, its high time I hit back to my original form…Talk … Talk and Talk!

Relationships!!!!!

2006-04-29T23:38:00.000-07:00

It is conceived, nurtured with bare … it is born, again nurtured, taken care of, it grows, matures, and after some time becomes fit enough to tackle any problem that comes by.

I m not writing about the human cycle but about another factor that has its hold on each of us—Relationship!

Most of us treat relationships, professional, personal or even acquaintances as plug play components to life. The irony is none of the relationships come so easily. For a healthy baby, even a mother has to develop a bond with the baby in her womb. When such is a scenario how can one expect to have a very smooth start off for relationships that involve two different personalities?

So what of all is this “Relationship”? Is it an emotion? Nay! Love is an emotion and to e in love with one another constitutes a relationship.

I believe, Relationship is like the birth of a Child. Just like every child is the outcome of the darkest secret of Nature, every relationship is the child of emotions. These emotions could either be from both the people involved in the relationship (a relationship mutually nurtured) spring from a single heart towards the other.

The child is grown with lots of love and affection. Care is taken to ensure nothing affects the child. The occasional fever the child gets is comparable to the occasional skirmishes any relationship faces. The fever indicates that the anti bodies are at action. This indication can either be supplemented by external antibodies so as to enable the system to spring to normal soon or could be left uncared and hence would prove fatal.

So, how do I justify the relationships that got badly hit by the strongest of skirmishes??

Simple, every relationship is born with the hope that it would be alive for a long time (its just like a mother who wants all her children to have a healthy, long life).

But it takes a beating when a feverish system either rejects all external medicine that’s provided or the medicine provided itself is wrong.

So how effectively should I sustain a relationship? Well, the only answer I can think of is a periodic introspection into the needs of the relationship. We get so engrossed in the ‘n’ number of relationships that our attention is bifurcated amongst them.

Every now and then we should try to look at the places were things could be patched up and reworked so as to avoid a pitfall there.

I find a relationship developing here... That of a blogger and her blog reader. And the immediate introspection tells me that I should stop this post here... Lest you find it a cut throat!

Mediocre misery

2006-04-04T04:38:00.000-07:00

Every mortal wants to succeed. Though the definitions off success might vary, Success remains the most cherished word (feeling, emotion) the human mind could comprehend.
I m least interested to write about Success now, nor about the other extreme called failure. But what caught my attention is the feeling and consequence of being caught between Success and Failure.
Success hogs limelight in every right sense. Failure too gets its chance of attraction. Success (or the good) gets applauded for being Successful whereas Failure (or the bad)is given chance to reach out to the people.
Pathetically forgotten are the folks held in between the good and bad.
Neither are the good enough to be chosen nor are they bad enough to be stoned. Caught in a very precarious position, they are comfortably forgotten.

The City with “The Best” label hogs the attention and gets the next big infra done and hence is benefited.
The city with “The Worst” label also hogs the attention and hence gets the next big
Package for Betterment and hence is also benefited.

The child who gets the first rank gets applauded in his Parent Teacher Meet and is encouraged to aim high. The child with the least mark gets badly reprimanded and hence is forced to strive hard. In both cases, benefits galore.

Lost in between the two ends are those mediocre ones; who either face the Cold shoulder they have been served with and scale the heights or lose the morale and slide back or they continue to live it as a way of life and resign to the agony of being mediocre.

Knowledge is the most important factor, some get it soon, some strive hard to get it and there are few others who are struck half way in the process.
Why is it we ignore the last sect of people often.
Why is it we recognize the best (inclusive of better, good) or the worst (inclusive of worse, bad)?
Does it send out a signal, if cant reach the pinnacle don’t worry go for the roots!!!

PERVERT THOUGHTS

2006-03-29T08:49:00.000-08:00

Gone are the days when songs, storyline of a movie made headlines. These days its their

Double meaning, triple meaning dialogues that capture the Fame spot. Well, the fame spot doesn’t always spell success; more than often the movie gets badly hit due to the same ‘Fame’ Factor.

These days, almost every other movie that gets released has acquired this Fame. I thoroughly accept the fact that most of these movies contain explicit contents but there a quiet a few movies that abstain from presenting such candid exhibition of “Censorable Contents”. Here comes the credibility of Human mind! The X Ray’ish tendency of human mind easily understands the “explicit contents” but also goes out of way to skin the gibberish to ravel rather discover or at times invent “Contents worth Censorable”.

Moving away from movies, even the real life scenario throws many occasions wherein we end up deciphering meanings (intentions) from an otherwise simple unintentional statement. The outcome of this art of decryption of intention brings in trouble and tension.

Why is this evolution of pervert thought process happening?

Why is it we always tend to look in for “that Inner Meaning” however simple the explicit meaning might be?

If your answer delves around “gauging the other person diplomatically”; then why is it we are not diplomatic enough to streamline our thoughts. Diplomacy begins with oneself. One should try being honest to ones thoughts rather than letting it get conceived through misconceptions. Miscarriages in pregnancy and Misconceptions in Thoughts both are painful because both last in us for a long time before we realize it’s gone! We could at least try not to be pervert in thinking which would go long way in building and helping relationships last longer.

Wonder, what you people expected the blog to contain when you read the title “PERVERT THOUGHTS!”?? Some cranky, dappled, shady, mottled, piebald stuff?? OMG... I M BEING A PERVERT!!!!

Intentions take time turning into Initiatives

2006-03-24T07:48:00.000-08:00

Why is it people fail to understand the motive of a small initiative. Be it the a small gesture of driving a social awareness campaign for Cancer or be it corporate gesture of Celebrating with your team or a more emotional gesture of telling your love that U do Love him/her!

Initiatives are often not accepted with an open mind. People are either too numb to realize the effort it takes for a person to take an initiative or they simply just don’t care!
Had it not been for newer initiatives’ (of course braving the hard slaps others give on it!) there wouldn’t have been any change in our lifestyle!

Looking at the big picture, the most successful people are those who have dared to make a change. The people for dare to believe and practice RULES and PROTOCOLS are for breaking and hence paving better ones. Be it the simple sun goes around the earth or earth goes round the sun fundae and the ruckus it created. It needs lots of courage to move away from the conventional thinking mode and voice a different tone altogether.

i wonder most of us .. even with the brightest of ideas within us, hesitate to take one brave move that could change the face of the earth.

It might mean taking a tight slap on face but would have a greater impact on the world than what fingers would make on the face!

“Quality” time

2006-03-10T07:14:00.000-08:00

Most married folks working with me often use this phrase “Quality Time”. They are upset because they are not able to 'Spend' Quality Time for their spouse, children and more so for themselves.

More than often, we find marital relationships crumbling under the pressure of work, Children complaining about their busy schedule of their parents, friends losing track of each other when their presence is needed the most. None of us marry to upset our spouse, none of us have children to spoil their mindset and last but not the least none of work to let it play havoc over our personal peace and pleasure.

In spite of all this, why is it we still crib about work affecting life.
Is it wrong to have a family when you planner has entries for career calls!
But history speaks the other tongue. Great people have very much had families. Its somewhere in between we people are messing up between the so called “WORK PRESSURE “and “PERSONAL LIFE”.

Just as I write this I m reminded of a forwarded mail I once received, a fellow dude had very clearly mentioned the changes he found in work before and after his wedding.
One prominent thing was...

His Bachelor life gave him the liberty to stay overtime with his work. This meant more effort; result and credit against his name. He was a very dependable resource. Once after his wedding, he started to juggle between his work and family,and ended up burning both the ends.

Somewhere in this transition, people loose track of their rational sense to manage their priorities.

What do they really mean by “Quality” when they say they are not able to give “Quality Time”. My profession as a software engineer forces me to look out Customer Satisfaction Index to define ‘Quality’.

Customer can again be divided into direct customer and indirect Customers.
The Direct Customer would be “ME” or “ONESELF”; and
the Indirect customer would be those people who are associated with me...in other words those who are bothered by the “Quality Time” I spent with them and those whose Disappointments ( in this aspect) bother me.

Which means the Quality Benchmark should vary in accordance with the person I am dealing with. A very simple example would be this; the Quality time I spend for my spouse should be different from what I spend for my child. I must not only look out to establish a chemistry between myself and the person I m trying spend “Quality Time” with; but also try to balance the equation.

It’s something like this:
I know the quality time and effort you are spending in reading this post.... (Chemical Equation Established)
I value your time... the post ends here… (Equation balanced!)

Mystic Melancholy

2006-03-03T02:49:00.000-08:00

Caution : this post too has lots of typos and grammatical flaws!!

She had got all that she wanted. A happy family, a posh home, a trendy car, a husband she loved and still loves, a sweet child with the sweetest of smile, an excellent and happening career.
What more could one ask for?
But here we have her asking for more. Maybe even ready to give up some of the above for more of something else. Something which is still ‘Something’ to her.
Every time the sense of emptiness creeps in, she feels the mighty dragon of melancholy slash her soul, mind, smile, thoughts, words, deeds and of late even the people around her.
The thought that she has missed and is missing ‘Something’ never stops nagging her.

Her thoughts started becoming more paradoxical with every attempt to unravel the mystery. The infection of sadness spread across her otherwise active mind. She never again experienced the excitement in her child’s eye which would have otherwise brought glee to its mother nor did she enjoy those memorable moments with her family. Her life started losing its petty charm.
The feigning smile and the laurels of success that adorned her closet camouflaged the mystic melancholy within her.

Luckily the rational voice in her prompted a wise move! A move drastic enough to shake off the giant within her.
She decided to unravel the Myth of the Mystic Melancholy.

Now came the bigger ordeal!! To realize what became the question!

It seemed like the quest of a mortal to realize God...
He knows GOD is omnipresent...And its a matter of a realizing His Presence.!
But to realize what becomes a question again!! Omnipresence has its own problems!!

On one such onslaughts of the mighty wave of melancholy, she decided to give it a mighty blow—whatever it might be.
It was decision taken at that moment but nevertheless a wise decision.
She started drawing in the timeline graph of the “Mystic melancholy Syndrome”.

Blah… blah…Clge projects ..Saying yes to HIM…Tying the marital knot ….
The loan she got ….The crucial project she took over in office …The kid …blah..

She tried to figuring out the common or remotely common factor or factors that would possibly connect those listed.

This factor turned out to be very elusive.

Random thoughts reached nowhere ….
The aspect that linked college project and the kid??
The link between her saying YES to his proposal and the recent project she took over?? The factor common to the vow of marriage that she took up and the loan proposal she jus committed to.... [p]..

For a second she felt the brightness of knowledge dawn on her. The link! The first glimpse of the culprit who for long has held her soul captive!

"The vow of marriage and the loan proposals.....both are commitments she needs to live up to!
The crucial projects and kids, acceptance of his proposal...all spelt commitments, all spelt responsibly!! “

The fear of facing the mighty giant made her numb with all the courage she could summon she tried to strip the culprit and recover the sheen it had held captive so long.

After a long struggle with the details of the past... She framed a conclusion. The conclusion was bitter. Bitter than the bitterest of pills the doctor can prescribe for the simple fact that ‘truth can never always be the way you want it to be!’
And the truth said she lacked conviction... She lacked belief... She hated being held accountable for anyone or any anything....
On the whole ... far within the successful family/career woman lay a very undependable, fragile soul.
With more and more success coming her way, the weight of commitment and belief also rocketed. Now that it has reached its threshold, it has caught her panicky!

A sigh of relief was still far. A task has been found but still undone!
Will she kill the ghost that haunted her soul for long?
Will she really wipe out the myth and make it a thing of past!
Will her ever come out the melancholy?
All these questions have a single answer.
Conviction is the key…! Will she unleash it?? It’s up to her rather her conviction to get things straight and slay the giant of the Mystic Melancholy!

The Thought process

2006-02-23T18:58:00.000-08:00

How effective is this process? Is it a controllable process or a uncontrollable process If at all it is a controlled process... Why aren’t we able to wipe out the vices…? Assuming vices take root in thoughts and then in actions .Incase intensions are indeed a subset of thought! Then why isn’t there purity in intensions! .why aren’t we able to control them
Why is the following reaction so disastrous!! ?

My thoughts + my actions ---> Consequences + (latent products like disappointments in others)
Why is it, we find a strain of Animal characteristics in all of us? The degree of predominance of that strain varies invariably though!

Assuming that the thought process as a Uncontrollable process!

Y in first place is it uncontrollable? Are we slaves of our thoughts! Isn’t it obsolete to say that we have the sixth sense!

If at all thought process is going to be so uncontrollable... Then why blame/praise anyone for whatever they do. After all... They don’t have a say over their thoughts!
Its their thoughts that direct them!

Oops! What have typed in!
Now don’t blame me... Blame my thoughts!

Southy Gal Syndrome!

2006-02-19T04:46:00.000-08:00

I m not sure as to how I would be taken after my north Indian friends(a few really close ones) read this post of mine!

It all started when I, for the first time, came face to face with people of utterly diverse backgrounds (Thanks to the training my company was putting me through).

Here started the Study of Southy Gal Syndrome..

First day, we were supposed to assemble in the auditorium.
The first job, first day excitement, guess what... there came the first hit on the Southy gals.

First day decent look for we southy ones meant Crisp Cotton chudidar, properly plaited hair, a set of earrings, neatly plaited hair(read no strands of hair over the face!), flat or platform sandals, one simple bracelet and a watch. Oops! Did I forget the bindi! A bindi with or without traces of kumkum or sandlewood paste above it!

This was how we gals were. By South Indian standards, this would be more than elegant. It looks refreshingly pleasing!

We are into the corporate society! Guess who taught us this early lesson.? The North Indian Girls. The looked like they were right out from a corporate meeting! Pinstriped suits with a hair in bun or let loose with Matching Handbag (I m still wondering.. how do people match handbags with their dresses!)

Phew…! I don’t think even the heroines down south dress up so impeccably! The next thought that struck me was an utterly comical attempt to visualize myself in such a attire! A conclusion follows soon... “Yeah ... I do look good, if not better.” You see certain things are better if not probed too much and “will this attire suit me” was definitely one of them.

Soon came the next biggie issue... (Issue not really ... next Fact should I say) Names. The utmost stylish South Indian names would include few priyas, archanas, lavanyas,nityas!

Just look at the following conflict of names… Lavanya VS Lucky, Neha Vs Nandini , Soniya VS Sowjanya,..gosh!

Since names are least used by their owner, it is even more important that it becomes likable by others! But one thing for sure I m happy we don’t have names with complicated syllables now! I started looking around for elusive names such as “SenThamizhSelvi” Or some “MuthamizhCheZhiyan”! here again we lost to the name charm of those girls!

Soon it was the time to mingle! Mingle for south Indian girls largely meant speak to the girls from your state. A few daring ones (including me) did attempt to throw a “shall I know u! “ kinda smile at others irrespective of the diversity in the syllable last heard.

On the other hand, every attempt to speak to a North Indian girl would go in vain unless and until you speak or attempt to speak in Hindi(a typical doubt rules…mujae Hindi AAthi hain or AAthaa hain)! The reason is so simple, we simply didn’t exist!

When we speak Hindi... They are awestruck!

My Day One came to an end. I start walking back home with lots of things to ponder about.

Throughout the training session, there was one aspect very evident in all most all North Indian Girls. Their Boldness! They were unassumingly bold.. ‘Unaassuming’ because they knew the consequence/impression their daringness might cast and yet chose to be so! For some unknown reason most of the South Indian girls play it low (albeit with exceptions like me!).

The most interesting venue for the comparative study was the Dance Floor.It took me lots of effort to bring a few South Indian girls to the dance floor.(lucky to have found couple of other Tamil gals with the same enthu level!). they came to the venue and there ends everything! They spent the whole evening watching the folks dance! Well we do need spectators to watch the folk rock right!

Having said all these, it now seems irresistible to avoid one more point( though I was deliberately trying to keep it away from hitting this article).

GUYS !

Be it workplace or classroom, its absolutely human to turn around when there are attractive people of the opposite gender! I found one mighty similarity amongst all guysin this aspect! They all seemed immensely enamored by the fair skin-straight hair of the North Indian girls!

I had enough friends and time in my training to observe this phenomenon. Though things like “knowing each other better “ did happen and lot of meaningful relationships did bloom, the preludes of the striking differences did stay alive in me. There was and is no antagonistic retraces on those preludes!

Having penned this article, I feel I should have ommited the final few paragraphs. Just as I selected the text and moved my fingers across the keyboard to hit the ‘Delete” key, a naughty voice within me chuckles,”someone did write about being Bold! Didn’t She?!!”:)
:)

Accepting people ........!

2006-01-13T07:33:00.000-08:00

People rarely turn out to be what we expect them to be. we get unhappy with people when we dont find them according to what we want.
But why is that we often forget that every individual has his or her own individuality that one has to accept.
we are so obsessed about our conception of the other person that we find it difficult to accept the individual as he is.
may be, it rightly said that home is a place where we are accepted as we are and whatever we are.
Unfortunately, there are two situations wherin we forget to "Accept People" as they are.
one being the society, ...
how often have we spent more time in analysing other's life style... ranging from the divorce the celibrity took up to his recent showoff of power...! though it has got absolutely no significance to us .

or be it in relations... here again people are so obsessed with not just their wants but also they dictate as to how others should be.
its an expression of getting things go their way .. though a ver strong managerial aspect .. it hardly respects others for what they are ..(leave alone considering what they do)!!!

so i feel they key for any realtionship to succeed is to basically understand that there is the soul .. an individual alive and happening in the person infront of us!
this basic courtesy would solve half of the problems we create and fret these days !!!

i perfectly understand the pain the readers undergo while reading my typo ridden posts!!! so here i stop this post!!!!!!

Faith ..........!!!?? !!

2006-01-11T02:43:00.001-08:00

Faith is unfailing belief. Faith can be very powerful and can greatly influence our attitude.
to put things more effectively , Faith is one component that builds the hue of one's attitude.
If it is to be belived that man shapes his own destiny then ....faith is certainy the most effective tool in his hands.

how is faith built!
Faith takes its root in belief.
a belief that gets strongly rooted in one's heart and mind transforms into Faith.
A poor result or outcome might shatter the belief that one holds on something.
When failures Dont shatter the belief, then , its understood that the belief has metomnorphised into Faith.

Fortunately, a Faith on certain aspects has been instinctively found in all living things!
for instance, Faith on the parents for the fulfilment of basic needs.
The scope of "basic needs" varies immensely amongst across the genre of living organisms!

As in case of Homosapiens, Faith in parents nutures faith in teachers and so on and so froth.
But, there are two 'Faith Factors' that most of us forget or rather pay very less attention to.

One being , Faith on oneself....

Self belief is the strong conviction that one has about wat he is capable of.
Faith is unfailing self belief. this is one unique quality that will help him bounce back out of the most clumsiest and demading or rather even most degrading situations.
Self Faith is the only tool that will help him out of the situation for in this world no help is as reliable as self help.

Second being, Faith on the Almighty.............

This is the most controversial topics that the discussion forums have.
to belive or not to belive is another issue.. but to totally negate the power of Supreme seems to be the fashion today.
though i belive its totally unethical to intrude into anyone's personal choices..(the choice of Faith on Almighty included).. i m left to wonder as wat makes them lose the belief or abstain from the belief!

LOC BETWEEN BEING COOL AND BEING CONSCIOUS

2005-12-23T04:42:00.000-08:00

Being a cool person helps one to get off the most clumsy situation.
this is indeed a nice attitude!
afterall who doesnt like to be in the company of cool ppl!

but here again is a small but very strong trouble awaiting the cool dudes and more so for the cool dudettes so to say!
the most cool ones are taken for granted.. and they really dnt mind being taken for granted though..
but the trouble arises .. when the degree of being taken for granted reaches its height!

after a certain level .. not only does it make things a bit clumsy for the Cool person
but also sort of does an image damage!

unbderstanding ones limits and staying within it..also doesnt help these "cool" ppl!
wat do u think could help these ppl out of the trouble!!

Dreaming.............

2005-12-08T04:13:00.000-08:00

Dreams ...
i luv dreams ... be it dreaming with eyes closed...or dreaming with eyes wide open!

i m a believe in visualisation..
and mayb .. would luv to call myself a probability thinker ..
i believe everything has to first take its shape in mind even before it could take form in reality!!

its a mother's visualisation of her unborn child in her womb that makes her relate to the child!!
Visualising one's ambitions and aspirations could make him even more determined towards his goal!!

but my visualasation techniques have reached profound heights now..
i ve started visualising the impending vacations during office hours..

hmmmmm now i m visualising as to how u ppl reading this post would react!!
immediate reaction to comment this post!!
if so lemme know!!

cheers

dreams are such a strong medium to realise one's wishes!!

Thoughts-Venture

2005-11-28T04:34:00.000-08:00

often, i m find myselff thinking about something or the other that is in total irrelevnce with wat i should be doing at that moment.
its jus a maze of thoughts ...but it happens for good.
Its through the adventure into the maze of thoughts, i apprise myself. ...a Self apprisal or rather crudely put a self realisation.
i ve never missed any oppurtunity to guage myself be it by myself or thru others.. ..
"wats ur opinion on me...?? " is a questioni repeat often to my friends ......and more so even to myself..
i luv to hear things from the lion's mouth!!!! rather than assuming wat exactly others might think of me..

but one of the rudest shock this thought venture gave me forced me to blog up this no matter how late i make it hme!!!

"Selfishness" this is the biggest accusation.. the thoughtventure graced me with..
in the name of trying to know wat i think and wat other think of me.. i think i ve grown a bit too self conscious..
this self conscious nature mite be a camouflaged self centric nature!!!
well.. i neither could reason out...the reason for my self conscious nature ..nor can i accept that i m self centric..(mayb i m really not)..
but this thought stream has held my thoughtventure still today!!

well... i m left here..sticking onto another maze ...is it perfectly alrite to try to know wats happening around u abt!!! or is any attempt to realise an unhealthy character trait!!

well.. .as i was abt to sign off this post .. i glanced thru this post..gosh... how many 'I's ,'Mine's, i ve used..
hmm.....!!!!!
:)

Thoughtless Words

2005-11-11T19:18:00.000-08:00

often we are unmindful of the words we use.. and the person we use them to.
the pain it causes and the damage it does to the relationship can be collosal.
but y is this happening over and over ..even though we know the outcome those costly words!

may be we should get use not oly grey cells but also our heart when speaking to others!!

cheers

Silent Spouses… A Silent Life??

2005-11-02T09:31:00.000-08:00

I met my friend today. She had actually dropped into give her marriage invitation.
We got talking about her fiancée. She described him as a man of few words and a silent demeanor. This girl is also a very coy, silent girl.
And my thoughts started clouding again with this topic..
With silent spouses,..How do people get their thoughts across? There is more to candid speaking in relationships as marriage than jus the regular “hi- bye”.
If silence is going be the mode of communication, will it help the relationship to grow leave alone thrive well!
While discussing this with another friend of mine, he suggested that the thought waves of the couple would sync with one another and form a new wave that both of them could relate to.
And hence the pieces of marriage fall into place beginning with the physical attraction aspect!
But again .. if even if the physical attraction should be so mechanical, auto-tuned as this, I feel, there is no point in being any different from the other fellow creatures of the world.
Communication or conversation that I m referring to here definitely isn’t limited to verbal world but also includes the non verbal communication!
More often in the name of not affecting other’s sentiments, emotions are hidden or worst of it are camouflaged. Pretending an emotion to be absent is far more acceptable than feigning some other emotion!
Maybe, on the other hand .. with time they realize the importance of communicative atleast to each other .. be it verbal or non verbal ..
But communication is indeed more Important than any other factor! Be it love, hatred, agony, sympathy , empathy ,anger or even lust ..everything needs to be expressed in order to be understood by the other person.
Unfortunately all of us are not mind readers and the gut feeling (intuition) is not always with us all the time!
Communication is the mighty tool that can loosen or tighten any relationship!
With marriage being a grand repository of feelings, emotions, thoughts and what not, it needs the medium of communication to announce its presence.

And above all .. u need a sound,rational mind to make a rational conversation..
Be it romantic or serious!
Be it contemplating a holiday destination or a divorce!!!
Be it finalizing the dinner menu or swearing at the spouse !!!!
Be it cajoling the unhappy spouse or be it proposing on the 25th anniversary!
Being communicative helps a great deal!!

Communication of my feelings.. yaeh .. I have done that!! But is it sound..? logical..?
It’s for the readers to decide!!!

Passions -- ripened desires?

2005-10-31T03:18:00.000-08:00

passion.. a serious desire ??

Of late, i ve been thinking about how serious i can get about desires and strong desires...

when contemplating about life long realtionships such as marriage... certain compromises are always made..
more than often.. small desires can be easily foresaken...
such as the guy giving up his desire to smoke or ve an occasional drink...
but when it comes to passions....
things get a wary turn..!!
so when does a desire turn into a passions...
are passions uncompromisable desires??

beauty with brains ???

2005-10-18T07:52:00.000-07:00

What can be more deadly than a beauty with brains..
A ravishing stunner with intellectual genius would make heads turn and would stir the hearts of her male admirers!!
But recently I found another trend..
Guys are falling more for the first aspect...i.e... Beauty...
This is not only limited to males...
Even females... Show this phenomenon...

People somehow or the other...Do not want to be challenged intellectually!
When people are challenged intellectually by a more intellectual person; its definitely not the best of feelings.. and an intention to wipe off such intellectually challenging relationships take root in heart!

So people settle down for a bright face than for a bright brain!!
Now should I use my grey cells.. or should I allow it to rust ..and start powdering my face!!??
Should I turn up to my beautician or to the nearest bookshop??
Dilemmas seem to rule my brain at this moment!
Oops why am I using my mind???

Temptations …

2005-10-17T09:47:00.000-07:00

Ever been tempted..?? Ever succumbed to temptation??

Today, I decided to go on a shopping spree!
I had made up my mind to be stringent on my purse!
But alas... it took a few very tempting dresses to make my resolve!

This set me thinking!
What’s this vice that mars my resolve.. ??
Its Temptation!
Now wats temptation??

Temptation is an expression developed out of strong liking ness!
When u like something (or some one..if I mite say so!!), u tend to develop a strong force of attraction that has the escape velocity to speed away from your resolve or grit!
This attraction is so mighty that u SEEMINGLY forget issues that mite ve to face!

Tempatation , I feel is a necessary evil to make the earth go around!
If everything and everyone is gonna be tailor made to your grit ..then where is life!
Life holds its splendor when it throws surprises!
Temptation clearly paves way for them!

So am I rite??
Is temptation in a person really needed today??

An extrovert girl…a guy's friend or spouse???

2005-10-15T09:51:00.000-07:00

Often my endless chatter with my friends instigates my thought stream!
Today was no different!

Yesterday, I heard a good friend talk about issues an extrovert girl faces!
Again today, the same topic creeped in my conversation with my buddy gang!
Here goes an insight into my topic for the day!

Gals who mingle well, friendly and wove well with the society are always welcome companions. But this companionship is limited to friendship!
Extrovert females don’t mind speaking to her male friends!
Male friends enjoy their companionship!
But when it comes to the issue of choosing a life partner…. The extrovert gals lose out to introvert ones!
I ve seen lots of introvert gals who with their unspoken words launch a flurry of cupid’s arrows in guy’s heart… and before u understand whats happening…u find a sweet pair!

Not only in love marriages.. even in arranged marriage.. I ve seen the coyer , introvert girls settling soon.. to rephrase in a more crude form…. Being chosen earlier than the extrovert girls!
Y is it the guys are keen on having introvert gals as spouse!
Is it something awfully disgusting in the extrovert gals …if so … y do the guys prefer the company of extrovert girls as friends!

What amazes me..men are able to define what exactly they want in their female friend and in their spouse! And women are more than often ignorant about this!
But the factor of differentiation…”extroverts Vs Introverts” sounds illogical if not dumb!!
Guess I ll leave it here .. ! hopefully new topic should await me tomorrow!

Sound of Silence

2005-10-13T04:39:00.000-07:00

Not so long ago, I had a discussion with a friend of mine about Silence.
Silence of mind … The power of silence..

Silence of mind, I was told is the most effective way of concentration and self realization!
I decided to experience it! I started with a positive outlook trying my level best to rule out any pessimistic vibe that came along!
I precisely tried to “practice” Silencing of mind once a day for the past 4 days!
This is how it came out..

First 5 mins…
I sit with the aim of achieving silence..
Outcome……
I found two thought streams.. both of which I channelised towards the Silence!.
...end of 5 minutes

Next 5 mins…..

I aim at establishing the silence..That was seemingly near..
Outcome….
I m at war with a huge wave of questions

End of 10 minutes..

Next 5 mins

I aim removing these questions ..but a thought prevails.. and I decide to face them; answer them all in one go before I proceed any further.

Outcome…
I m busy searching for answers and apprising my deeds
End of 15 mins

Thats it!
My voyage in search for silence has to break for the day!
Next day same thing continues, of course, with a different set of questions!

I had one good thing about this entire experience… the questions that I faced where those I have not bothered or have not answered or did not chose to answer!
It made me think over and again about few issues and resolve few issues!

Well still, if this is the music of silence…
Then the melody of silence is definitely lost in the gory of the lyrics called thoughts!

SELF ESTEEM...VICE or VIRTUE??

2005-10-12T08:59:00.000-07:00

Self Esteem…..EGO

I was led to think about this quintessential aspect by one of good friends!
How important is Self esteem?
What is Self esteem??
Is it accepting oneself as he is!
Is it loving oneself for whatever he is!
Is it taking pride in whatever he is!
Well, I always believed Self esteem is having pride in whatever u are!
Well, there is absolutely nothing wrong in being happy and proud about urself..but it largely depends on the persistence on word “self”.
Too much of persistence on the “SELF ESTEEM” factor breeds “EGO”
It requires a balanced head to take on Self Esteem and wipe out EGO.
But Ego, once rooted, is hard to remove!
Ego invariably is the cause for almost all problems!
With such a potential risk at hand, is it viable sustain a degree of SELF ESTEEM!
Indirectly is not out attachment to the word “SELF ESTEEM” causing the problems!

Well in the same tone..
Why should I be so bothered about what every other person I meet thinks about me.
Why am I so conscious about what others think about me rather than what I think about myself!
Is the child in me still learning the way of the world?
I always believed humility is the best virtue. Today I heard humility plus Self Esteem is the best way to lead life!

Maybe I was wrong all these days!
Maybe I must nurture self Esteem to a greater degree!!
But am I mature enough to evade EGO???

Spirituality and Religion!!

2005-10-07T22:35:00.000-07:00

Religion and Spirutuality are they different ??
I recently faced a question in a public discussion
regarding the ritualistic worship that most of us do!
it set me thinking..
Be it any religion.. why are ve so particular abt the rituals.. be it The Sunday mass,namaz or sandya vandanam! y is it we are consicous abt these rituals..
are rituals the shortest way to the Supreme...
well i truely feel.. any religion dictates the way of life.. it merely uphold as to how life can be righteously tread! these rituals are a few disciplinary measures flavoured with the essence of Faith!i dnt mean to say that the flavour is here to instill fear!! but its here to instill habit!
so how can the Supreme be realised!

Words Fail!!!

2005-09-21T09:00:00.000-07:00

For a person who is candid and communicative..its easy expressing his thoughts ! thoughts,an expression of heart, feeling and soul, finds its shape in words!! but .. what about those who are introverts!! i started thinking about this issue... when i confronted a friend who was madly in love wih a girl but could hardly express it! i told him a number of times to go ahead and propse his love!! but his courage failed!! i mean.. i shouldnt use the word Failed... because he hardly tried speeling his thoughts aloud!!
its not jus him... mostof us turn introverts in certain situations! even the most communicative of us .. find it difficult expressing our thoughts..often when its most needed!! why is this happening??
maybe... when we are still not clear in our thoughts..our words get muffled and finally nothing reaches the other person!
wat ever its...its not gna help either anyone!! oops... y are my words failing me now!!!!

THE ULTIMATE INDIAN MARRIAGE

2005-09-20T09:17:00.000-07:00

THE ULTIMATE INDIAN MARRIAGE

For a girl.. it beings the day her college life with the last day of her college life!!

Her mom’s sis quips..’ maybe we should start groom hunting now!!”
Her parents are brainwashed and are made to take the gal’s horoscope to the astrologer!!
After a series of calculations... the astrologer would predict the position of Saturn. GURU..!!
And thence would begin the search ..Which would even put google to shame!!?
The girl’s horoscope would be circulated amongst relatives…. Thanks to email –literate Indian parents; the horoscopes fly across the seas, over the mountains to reach a relative!!

Once the groom hunt begins... The entire vocabulary of the household changes…

The short listed grooms are mostly identified through their queer nicknames..

IIT paiyyan ….a guy who graduated from IIT
Thivaiyaaru paiyyan.. a guy with Thivaiyaaru as native
Rohini natchram paiiyan
Anda gothram inda gothram….vathima …vadaamaa… .
Jadakam
Sevva dossham
Tamil matrimony.com
Shaadi.com

Gosh…. The vocabulary is very very exhaustive!!

The girl initially makes her wish list and disappears. Once the parents decide on the intial short listed potential grooms, she makes an entry to make her final top 5!!
Before this is the very diplomatic move called “Pics Exchange”. Very ceremoniously, the parents of both the guy and the girl exchange the photos of their child!
The choice of the photo varies from casual (at home attire ) to formal ( aka Raymond) to gorgeous (a la Maduri Dixit) snaps!

I still wonder what people find out in photos.

Well … if found acceptable! ; then the alliance proceeds !
Else … “Has the other gal sent her pics!!! ..Lemme check the mail!!” attitude prevails!!!

2005-09-18T02:38:00.000-07:00

WHY DO U DO THIS TO ME??

I guess this is the sentence is the root of many arguments

Arguments between teenaged children and their parents..Argument between lovers … arguments between husband and wives.. Argument between ur manager and u!!

Each of us need a degree of importance attached to us. More often we want this degree of importance to be explicit. Latent respect / regard doesn’t serve the purpose today !!

I have seen relationships go sour because of the lack of exhibiting one’s love!!

I this world of attractive advertisements… even the most delicate and closest of relationship need EXPLICIT EXHIBITION of affection.
I wonder as to why…..public exhibition of affection has become pivotal in the relationships of heart!!

The only reply I gather is that…. It’s a way of reassuring each other of the love between them!
I recently heard a close friend of mine confide that he broke away with his sweet heart just because he was unable to tell her how much he still loved her!!! And that he did not want her to keep yearning for his coaxy words !

I was just dumbstruck… well, I think.. This relationship should mature with time and the adversities it faces!!
Breaking apart for silly reasons like “ degree of importance “ factor ..Actually mitigates the worth of going further in that relationship!

So next time u ask ur beloved one “ WHY do u do this to me?? ?? “ ..kindly think .. is the havoc really needed!!

2005-09-17T09:45:00.000-07:00

DUETS Vs DUELS

I happen to meet two of my batch mates from college today. After the regular Vetti kadais ...We got talking about love, lovers etc..

The first thing I asked my friends-both of them are commited ,was “do u miss ur guys ?“ bang came their reply …. “nowazz,, y would I miss him ? What if I don’t see him every other day! I do talk with him!! So no missing him business!!”

my conclusion :: Remove the song “ evano oruvan vaasikiraam…” from Alaipaayuthae..

The next question…

“Do u fight?? Who starts the fight?? “

their reply … “we fight .. we fight like dogs!! All language rules are grounded!! “
my other friend who was celebrating her 4 anniversary said …. “the first month was the only period sans war…!! Duels were more than duets!! “

my conclusion :: duels were more than duets!!

The question::
“When do your guys get angry???”

Their reply:: “ whenever they want .. For whatever they want!!”
They did explain …
Every time..The fourth ring from their guy goes unanswered……a fight begins~ demanding the reason for delay!!!
Every time… the mobile is switched off…..a fight begins demanding the reason for that
Every time u say “ I m held up with an important work ….a fight begins reasoning whether he isn’t important
Every time .. u say “dad asked me to get home early !”….a fight begins!!

The other reasons they voiced seemed out of the world…I jus started wondering .. if they were in love with a male over 21 ….or whether a toddler around 2.1

Finally ….. I learnt…love laughs for a month….smiles for the next six months… goes grin throughout the following year..
And after a year …. U just need to search for the smile ….!! Its back to business!!

Ultimately:

My friends conclusion::: “ SUHA… NEE MOVIES PAATHU ROMBA INFLUENCE AAGIRKAAA!! AVOID SEEING ROMANTIC MOVIES IF U WANT TO GETOFF THE FILMY IMAGE AND WANNA C THE REAL ONE !“

2005-09-16T04:37:00.000-07:00

WILL GEMINIANS EVEN LEARN TO GET COMMITED ??

Born on june 5th, I fall under the sunsign of Gemini..the Air sign!

Geminans are utterly whimsical nd fickle ..known to be a fun package
They are very good company!
Not to forget ..they re one of the biggest flirts next only to themselves!

I ve every trait of it.. And it reflects in me…..
But there is one miserable trait I love to change

Gemini’s never get easily committed to anything... be it men, art, books whatever..!
Their ever wandering mind...strains when forced to remain stable!!

I love art …art of any form has a patron in me…
my short lived stint with Bhartnatym, music , poetry, writing , linguistics are all reflections of the Gemini in me.
True to the Jill of all trades label…. I went places not exactly with my talent but for learning them!!

Fortunately with parents ready to spend upon my interests I indeed got trained from few of the best teachers … slowly but steadily I was getting noticed for my talents!

So far so good… the trouble arose with the sustenance of the interest!
The interest seemed to wane from its shining full moon glory to nothingness…
The rate of waning depended more on my mood rather than on the complexity of the art form or time! Soon ..i started fishing out reasons to bunk classes…reasons to escape practicing at home …slowly ..The inclination to learn an art bent its head!!
Jus the inclination to master the art had disappeared.. Not the love for the art form!!!

Every now and then..It did sprout up! But I decided not to take the gamble...
I m still awaiting for the day.. I feel….. I can take up lessons ...Lessons to its completion!!
coomitmnt holds the key to this!!
Commitment …….. Happens when u are ready to do anything! Anything encompasses everything from liking to sacrifices!!

Well... I m being so inconsistent in my commitment quotient.. I wonder... What my stand would be in larger emotional commitments awaiting me in my life!!!
Will my good Stars drop in a bit of sense in me…!???

Hey wait… I can no longer commit myself to the topic… here comes the next thought……………….

Well …so why am I linking it to the sun signs……?? What an easy way to justify oneself!!! Do I smell an Attitude issue here??

Next thought……”lemme make a cup of hot coffee. or kaapi !